Close your Eyes
by IrishNun
Summary: Even as a child, Sam always trusted his big brother. 'Close your eyes' may have been a simple instruction but it held a lot more than words to Sam. (Spoiler Season 10 Episode23)


Title: Close your eyes

Authors Note: It's been a while (nearly a year, I think). I lost my mojo for a while, then I witnessed 2 real life incidents and thought of a young Sam and Dean. The last episode of Season 10 sealed the story. Please enjoy.

SNSNSNSNSN

They had been chasing each other all morning. Dean loved to hear him scream. It was rare and beautiful. He pinched his little brother every time he got close and Sam would squeal with laughter and run away a little faster. Round and round, the brothers played. Round their father's legs, round their uncle's legs, under the table, round the car, they chased each other into circles. "Slow down," their father would say and they would, for a moment, but then Dean would wink and Sammy would smile. His eyes light up to the thrill of the chase and he would be on the move again. He was only three, so he couldn't run that fast but Dean would shorten his steps and always kept a little behind.

All of a sudden, Sam tripped awkwardly and flopped to the floor.

Silence.

Then screams.

Dean pushed heels of his hands over his ears. He had never heard anything so loud.

Bobby ran to them first and swept Sam into his arms. There was blood flowing from his mouth and down his chin. John ran to Dean. "What did you do, Dean?" he yelled. "I told you to stop," he shouted. He removed a hankie and wiped Sam's mouth but the blood kept coming. "It looks like a tooth," Bobby noted and John nodded.

John knelt on the dirty ground in front of Dean and tightly grabbed the boy's arm. "What have I told you? What have I said to you a thousand times before?" He forcefully took the boy's hands away from his ears. "You listen to me, Dean," he ordered. Tears glistened in the boy's eyes. They both looked up to the crying baby. His top was now soaked in red. John's head dropped before turning back to Dean. "With my job... I can't be around all the time," he said softly. "You have to be the man when I'm gone. You have to protect Sammy when I can't. You have to grow up, son. You just have to grow up." Dean's small head nodded. He didn't want to hear Sam cry like that again. He would do better, he promised.

His father nodded and stood back up again. He examined the baby's mouth. The two front teeth were loose enough to come out. Bobby nodded and held the baby tightly. John held the baby's face in his hands. "Close your eyes, Sammy. It'll stop hurting soon," he promised.

SNSNSNSNSN

John had always hated flying. Thousands of meters in the air, enclosed in a tin can, surrounded by complete strangers was not his idea of fun. He much preferred being closer to the ground, surrounded by metal that he bent into shape with his hands. He took a swig from the silver flask he had smuggled through security and smiled at the air hostess that looked down at him as they passed. With a wink and a wave, the hostess turned away from him again. John looked back to his sons. Dean hated flying as much as John did. He had only been on one other flight before and the fear of being in a small space stayed with him.

Dean held onto the seat so tightly his knuckles were starting to turn white. His breathing was shallow and he was grinding his teeth so much you could nearly see the sparks. Sam was looking up to his brother offering suggestions to get him through the six hour journey. "Stop it, Sammy," Dean pushed him away, telling him to shut up. But the quietness was worse. The plane groaned and clicked every few minutes causing Dean's eyes to dart back and forth. After a while, Dean's eyes grew heavy. The cabin lights softened and Sam's light snores were becoming contagious.

All of a sudden, the plane dropped and Sam screamed with fright. The overhead lights brightened and the pilot's voice appeared telling everyone to put back on their seatbelts.

"God dammit it, Sam," John woke up from his drunken coma. The boy's eyes filled with tears and his bottom lip quivered. "Oh for heaven sake," his father shouted, "don't be such a child. Stop crying and grow up," he shouted in reaction to every cry the boy made. He unbuckled his belt and, forgetting where he was, stood out of his seat. He faltered when the plane dropped again and drunkenly tried to make his way up in the aisle. One of the hostesses asked him to take his seat again but this man wasn't listening. He was drunk and he wanted to get off the plane. He didn't care how many people he would have to go through.

Sam felt a tickle on the back of his hand. He felt the same tickle on his cheek drying his tears. It was his big brother. Dean's fear of flying was gone, even if it was just momentarily. Dean's baby brother was his only priority now. Although, he was just as terrified of what was happening to the plane, their father was gone forcing him to step up. The plane dropped again and two male passengers jumped John from behind but Sam's eyes remained on Dean's. The tears were slowly disappearing and his bottom lip barely shook. Dean smirked. "Close your eyes, Sammy. We'll be landing soon. I promise."

SNSNSNSNSN

Sam raised his hand in defence forcing the man to stop. "Okay, okay, I give up," he said spitting the blood out from his mouth. He was on his knees now looking up at the man who was beating him. He couldn't defeat him no matter how much he wanted to. His big brother was just too strong.

"Close your eyes," Dean ordered. Those words, Sam thought, gave comfort once. When Sam heard them, he knew everything would be better. That Dean would help make him better. But that wasn't to happen this time. "Sammy, close your eyes," Dean ordered again.

"Wait", Sam reached inside his pocket and pulled out the photos he had taken from his brother's room. "Take these," he pleaded still desperately trying to save him. Sam wasn't going to give up even if his brother already had. "And one day when you find your way back, let these be your guide. They can help you remember what it was to be good, what it was to love", he sighed and dropped two photos of their mother on the ground between them.

The brothers exchanged a look. Sam gave a smile of love and acceptance... and hope. He wished his brother felt the same and waited to hear the swish of the blade take him away.

He closed his eyes and knew Dean was going to make it better. He always did. Sam trusted him even if it meant taking his own life.

He closed his eyes.


End file.
